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Who I should not date?

How to identify an unwanted date in advance


Sometimes you go on a blind-date with someone you just met online and you regret the moment you left home. Yes, it happens... In order to avoid these kind of situation, we give you here some tips how to identifying Types to Avoid in advance already from the beginning on the dating site, who you should date, and who you should stay away of:

1 Watch for signs of abuse.
Abuse can be physical, verbal, emotional, psychological, financial, and sexual, and sometimes people may show early warning signs of being an abuser. If someone blames you for things early on, appears entitled, holds onto resentment, or has a high sense of superiority, these can be red flags for potential abuse. The problem is, most abusers can hide their behaviors and you may only notice abusive tendencies once you’re attached. Watch closely for the following warning signs and take them seriously when they emerge:
They try to rush you into a relationship faster than you are ready for or used to.
They appear "too good to be true."
They appear to be your perfect match and/or have no flaws.
They always blame others, including you, for anything negative that happens, and they don't take responsibility for their actions.
They constantly criticize you, put you down, or try to control how you look or what you wear.
They try to limit your access to your family and friends.

2 Know your non-negotiables.
If you have strong views about what you want to avoid in a potential date, be clear in your mind what those things are. Perhaps you refuse to date someone who eats meat, likes a particular sports team, or is really messy. Know what things you are absolutely sure you cannot and will not budge on and narrow potential dates out with these things.
For example, if you had a bad previous experience on a date or in a relationship, learn from your mistakes and vow never to make the same mistake again. If you dated a moocher before, don’t do it again.
Even when you make non-negotiables, be prepared for them to change. For example, if you feel certain you cannot date someone under or over a certain height, you may actually find someone wonderful who doesn’t quite fit that criteria. Be prepared to change items without feeling bad or guilty. Just don’t compromise your values.

3 Avoid “players.”
A player is good at playing the game, yet ultimately he or she can hurt you. Look out for warning signs of a player, such as someone who is overly bold, comes on very strong emotionally, orchestrates overly romantic dates, has many acquaintances but few friends, and is a thrill seeker. These can be indications that you’re with a player, not a genuine man or woman. While players make you feel good, the feelings quickly dwindle and may leave you feeling empty much sooner than you anticipate.
Remember that players play the “game” and are quite good at it. Don’t get swept up by a man or woman who plays the game well.

4 Meet new people.
One of the best ways to know what works for you and what does not is meeting lots of people. Learn from each interaction and expand your knowledge of people and the world. Be willing to go on lots of dates and explore what traits attract you. You’ll likely meet people who interest you and also people who disgust you. Keep in mind that by meeting certain people, you gain a clearer understanding of what kind of person you want to date and what traits you’d like to avoid.
For example, you may realize that you want to date someone with kids, or you want to date someone without kids. It’s important to figure these things out early.

5 Be open to possibilities.
There’s a difference between knowing what you want and being picky versus being biased, callous, or shallow. It’s not fair to say that “all men are jerks” or “all women are high maintenance.” If you’ve been burned before, let it go and wait until you’re ready to move forward once again. You may feel strongly about not dating certain people, but be ready to critically think about that boundary.
It’s good to know what you want to avoid, but also be willing to look at why those things matter. If you avoid dating people from a certain city, ask yourself if you’re limiting yourself due to a certain bias or bad experience.

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